"Deadlines"
So my mother recently told me to "practice what I preach". Before, I thought it was just lyrics from that song by Justin Timberlake, but now I know it's about doing the things you tell others to do. Such as turn in your homework everyday, so I should turn in my homework everyday so as not to be aloof. Probably this would be the thoughts of an advanced fourteen year old in story books, not a sixteen year old going on seventeen. It's basically normal. Which is what I think. I am normal for a sixteen year old.
So my day was bad. I can't say it was good all the way but it's perhaps because I'm being careless. I'm going to find counters to them.The angel's advocate basically.
1. I knew most of the questions on my honors chem vocab test today.
2. I was woken up by my trig teacher this morning. In more ways than one.
3. The trig quiz today helps me know what I struggle on so I don't fail the trig test on Thursday when I study.
4. I can buy a new cellphone charm.
5. Yay~ for my best friend who is now the new artist for Journalism.
6.I work on my second drafts for journalism today.
7.I bought a new water bottle at school.
8.I could ask another available teacher for anime club to settle at.
9.Just deleted my facebook account because it's too distracting for me.
It's fine though because it was my choice...bad luck comes in three so I just wanted to use that as a fill-in. Just summarizing how much Tuesdays mean to me in a simple and kind way. I know entries like this are meant for people to vent and such. But who wants to hear me vent? Please raise your hand. It would be too stressful. And here, is a place I don't want to make my stressful place. I want to make it my peaceful place. Every time I log on I don't want to think that when I go back to my blog it's something just for me to remind myself of my past troubles. Like that post the other day about me not doing my History homework. I really hope everyone doesn't mind that I use this more as a diary than an art blog or a site dedicated only to anime because I haven't been in the mood to draw. My muse is on vacation, my head is in the books, and my heart is beating for time. Time to finish everything before the deadlines.
Sometimes my optimism might not be enough for myself, but for others it may be the very thing they need. And when they have it, it will spread, and then I will be happy too. I don't want to live like a greedy rich of hate kind of person. The kind of person I strive to be is a calm, happy, relaxing, joyful, cheerful girl who has a say for everything. And if I love myself enough, I would let myself drift that way. To live for myself and others. I'm just saying this so when it comes the time when I want to rip my hair out and commit suicide, I won't. Or if I really do go with it, someone will how I
was before I died. I think it's special to know someone, especially of this age who has been through life the way I had to remember such a person like that. Personally, I think I grew up too fast but I guess it's because of circumstances where pain comes in. Past and death, loss and leave, heart is broken. I can't say anymore because I need to finish my homework now. It was nice talking to you again. :)
And thanks for hearing me out.

[2010/09/21 19:35 ] | Category: None | Comments(0) | Trackbacks(0)
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